The Ruination of the Earth

The greatest obstacle to the emancipation of the environment from the catastrophic destruction we have caused it, is the rate at which we spawn into this earth. There is just too many of us. Our ever increasing population has done but little good to our universal home.
Over the last hundred years the population of the earth has increased exponentially and we have now surpassed the 7 billion milestone.
We have the freedom of will and choice to make more of us but is it doing the collective whole any good? We have destroyed most of the forestry on the planet to produce paper and other products that we use on a daily basis and this in turn has allowed for changing global conditions causing icy mountain caps to melt, rising water levels around the world. The climatic conditions of the place that you live in are significantly different to even ten years ago. There have been over 54 animals that have gone extinct in the last 100 years including the Western Black Rhinoceros. So how have we let this calamity get this worse?

The problem isn’t with ignorance. We have seen, heard even voiced our opinions on the acknowledgement of the destruction of our planet, but we do nothing about it. We think some scientist holed up in a lab in a far away part of the world will figure out the answer to global warming and other harmful intrusions we have made into the flourishing verdant nature that this earth once used to be. We think that with all the phenomenal advances in technology we will be able to alter the global weather conditions and miraculously rejuvenate the primordial essence of our planet. Well, this isn’t going to happen.
We have let this despicable unrestrained annihilation of the planet go too far. We have stopped thinking in the collective and started thinking just as individuals that go on about this planet and then leave when we are done doing what we do. We need to start thinking in terms of future generations but that may be quite hard for some people as selfishness has become a more predominant trait amongst us humans over the time we have roamed this planet as the dominant species.

Having said all that, the necessary change to fix our mess is still within reach, but I’m afraid not for too long. We do know objectively what needs to be done to reverse the damage we have caused OUR earth. We know that 600km x 600km of square area with solar power facilities can provide electricity to a billion people and that is 1/7 the population on the planet. Imagine the load that this project will take off fossil fuels and nuclear power if it were to ever be implemented. The UK have plans to utilise the oceanic space with 120 900km^2 nourishment lagoons that encapsulate small creatures in them, that take in carbon dioxide from the atmosphere. This in turn will reduce carbon emissions around the world. We have come up with these miraculous technologies that make use of the oceans and creative forms of utilising renewable energy yet we are hindered by the one stark reality that drives everything in the world we live. Money. Everything we do revolves around money. people are only willing to invest and help if it can make them money. We as humans have truly become slaves to this green paper, however there is nothing “green” about it.

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Love and all its faces

What is love? What are the fundamentals? Not everyone experiences all challenges that love can pose, so any one person in this world cannot possibly know everything about love. Is it just a feeling? What exactly is it? Is love defined by the challenges we overcome?

I believe love is one of the strongest forces in this universe. It has proven to do miraculous things. Whatever it is and whatever form it may be in, we all feel it and it always leaves an impact on our lives. Love pushes us beyond our normal limits. It brings a sort of illumination into our darkness and companionship to our hungry loneliness. Everyone experiences it in different ways but it certainly is the most alluring thing on the planet having everyone wanting it at some point in their life and for some all the time. Love brings out the best in all of us, at least for some time: when we want to project our best and most appealing self to the person we are in love with. At the beginning of a relationship we instinctively we hide our bad and ugly at the thought of possibly losing the person we love. Time goes by and its always wonderful seeing that person and you think you could stare into their eyes forever. Just the thought of them brings a smile to your face and then the masks fall off and all we begin to see are the faults in each other and with every fight and argument you begin to realise how much they don’t seem to fit into your puzzle. No longer is it about the person you love. It becomes about ourselves. we might hate to admit it but the truth is we don’t even see it sometimes. Realisation comes but most often its not brought upon on its own, and sometimes its too late and the bond that was created with so much bliss at the beginning eventually seizes to be and comes to an end. What happens then?

Well, then love becomes the greatest contradiction and we become the biggest hypocrites. Things we say when we were a couple render meaningless and words become the most transparent things of all, and you feel as though the universe looks back at you with condescending eyes. Sometimes after the the argument phase love can take another path. As time passes and the the couple gets a feel for the relationship and its pace we set limiters in our head that prevent us from seeing bad in the other even when we know it exists. We simply just look the other way when we see these things and hope it passes soon enough. We let that negativity sink and yet remain sane enough to continue to be with that person and and love the good bits in it. We forget what a relationship is supposed to feel like and we become accustomed to the suffering. All that until we can no longer take anymore of it.

This is a cycle and it repeats on and on with the next person that comes into our lives. We have to reflect on the mistakes we do, our flaws and the things that we did, whether they were knowingly or unknowingly that made the whole thing fall apart in the first place. If we don’t fix our shortcomings now we carry them on to the next one and then life could award you with a wonderful person, someone who you might feel some connection with that you have never felt before but you won’t be able to keep that person in your life because you never progressed mentally since your last relationship.

If we talk about people who have been together for years. Does their love die out?
I don’t think love can die out. Love sure does give all of us the butterflies in our stomachs but when it comes to keeping a relationship together, love just isn’t enough. One should come from a place of compassion and always put the other person’s happiness before their own.

Why I gave up on intoxications

Drunkenness is temporary suicide: the happiness that it brings is merely negative, a momentary cessation of unhappiness.

— Bertrand Russell on Alcohol use

Like every teenager growing up i was exposed to alcoholic drinks and cigarettes (A&C). At one point, everyone in school was doing it. Bunking lessons and smoking on the fire escapes. I wanted to try a cigarette but I also wanted to stay away from it. I knew my parents would be mad if they found out. All my friends were doing it including my best buddy from back then. The two of us would always get in trouble back in the day. We were that duo the teachers hate, it always felt like they were waiting for us to do something wrong so they could punish us. Thing is we enjoyed breaking the rules, what could have been more fun? Back then if we were told to do something we would do just the opposite. we had no clue where we were heading or what we were doing half the time. it was just fun and games all day. my buddy indulged in fermented liqueurs and cigarettes, I didn’t however. I don’t know why but at that point in life I didn’t really care for it as much.

As I grew up I became more exposed to A&C. the first cigarette I smoked was at the age of sixteen. i remember being upset and a friend offered me one and I just thought “why not?” I regret that moment, for having taken it. I could have stopped myself but i put it between my lips and lit it. It didn’t stop there. It wasn’t just the one, I started smoking regularly. All my friends were doing it. Somehow it seemed cool at that time. It was like the new thing. little did I know that it was ruining me. you see i was an athlete. I did many sports; Tennis, Swimming and Athletics. I was very active but the smoking was slowly deteriorating my body. I would tire out so easily. I couldn’t play for as long as I used to. Somehow around that time I was also influenced into taking alcohol. I would get drunk with friends or my cousins. I stopped all sports completely. you’d think that was it. my penultimate year in school I took marijuana for the first time. It wasn’t a good experience though. I had a panic attack and I passed out right away in backyard of the house opposite my school at around 11pm in the night. you might wonder why I was at school that late in the night. There was an astrological event I was attending at school that night. I managed to get myself home and slept it off. It was a bad trip. The panic attack didn’t put me off I smoked it a couple more times before I went off to university. I also got caught smoking in my room to my mom. She was disappointed in me and that really hurt me a great deal.

Out here at university I had all the freedom to do whatever it was that I wanted: Party, drink, smoke. There wasn’t really anything stopping me from doing anything. I don’t know what it was but something came over me. I bought a pack of cigarettes and I smoke one my first week in university. For some reason I hated it. Something my mom said to me before I left for university hit me. I threw away the pack and I sat down on my bedroom floor and cried. My mom told me “if ever you find a cigarette in your hand think of me before you smoke it.” I couldn’t get her words out of my head. I felt like I betrayed her. That feeling that I got impacted me and I stopped smoking. I even avoid hanging around people who smoked. I developed a disgust towards it. That disgust spread to alcohol as well and I stopped that as well. I wanted to get my life back, my body back, back to how it used to be before I took all these intoxications.

I started swimming again at the university gym. My first day I only managed to swim 50m, thats just 2 lengths. I was ashamed of myself and what had happened to me. I used to take part in competitions back in the day, but here I was standing in the pool regretting what I had done to myself. I didn’t let it get me down. I used that regret as motivation. I started to swim religiously for a week and by the end of it. My efforts rendered fruitful. I managed to swim 40 lengths, 1000m. I was claiming my life back. I felt like I was back in control, back where I wanted to be. I continued to push myself and I even took part in a charity swimming completion called the Swimathon with a group of friends. I didn’t stop there either. I started working out. Gym became my next calling. I’m two and a half years sober now. haven’t touched a cigarette or a drink since that day.
I feel like i’ve got my life back, devoid of these demonic intoxications. without them, I have clarity. i have come to realise that this life’s journey is far greater than these vengeful juices and toxic smoke. I don’t have an inclination towards them anymore. I don’t even feel like trying them. I am now able to even be around people that drink. when am offered I politely decline. Some might think it rude, but they haven’t seen what I have seen, or been through what I have been through.
I believe first and foremost one has to love oneself. That will breed the change they seek, if they seek it.

Happiness or Well-being?

What is happiness? everyone seems to have their own definition of it. whenever someone asks me if i am happy? i always say yes unless i am actually upset. the instances i say ‘yes’ i find the voice inside my head questioning if i actually am? i mean i am well, I’m alive and i have enriching i need, but is that happiness?
Son of french philosopher and buddhist monk Matthieu Ricard states,

“Happiness is a state of inner fulfilment, not the gratification of exhaustible desires for outward things.”

He also says that the great thinkers left the word happiness in the vague. happiness is transitory. when you feel the so called emotion, in that precise moment you cannot quantify it or cling onto it. It will eventually subside and leave behind something else, needless to say sadness, anger, resentment loneliness they are all the same. Its not possible to constantly feel one such emotion forever. This makes me really wonder what people with suicidal tendencies feel. After all, as I said in a previous post all actions take root in thought first, whether it be consciously or subconsciously.

So when we have all these countless emotions why do we constantly seek happiness? whats so very special about it? everyone has something different that makes them happy. everyones’ trophies at the end of this pursuit for happiness is different. Some want materialistic things like expensive sports cars and estate mansions, some want to get away, some want that top job, some want to find someone to love, and so on, but what happens after they actually get what they wanted. They would achieve this state of happiness. They would have gotten where they wanted to be, but it doesn’t really stop there does it? There isn’t anything on this planet that could satiate human greed. When we get what we want we set our sights on something better and it goes on and on until we die. Somehow I can’t seem to find a meaning in a life like that. It just seems like an endless journey since the day we were born to get that happiness trip that lasts for a short while and then go out and seek it again. Surely I’m assuming life has to be more meaningful than that.

Matthieu Ricard also defines wellbeing as.

“Wellbeing is not just a pleasurable sensation it is a deep sense of serenity and fulfilment. a state that underlies all emotional states and all joys and sorrows that can come ones way”

It is not just that happiness isn’t a condition to wellbeing but wellbeing is the entire absence of happiness or any other emotional state. What is this state that he speaks of and how can it be achieved? The answer was meditation. Concentration and the focusing of the mind to develop this state of nothingness. A state that gives way to deep calm, emotional stability and well being. meditation is the gateway. I also believe that if you constantly enrich your mind with positive thoughts and emotions you draw and attract positive things and experiences, and if you cloud yourself in doubt and sadness you will only attract more misery to yourself. This is what the law of attraction dictates.

Wellbeing can be permanent. Happiness not so much. Being well doesn’t exactly translate to wellbeing. The meaning behind those words is deeper than most would think. Maybe one day I will find myself somewhere in the mountains of himalayas exploring these aspects of wellbeing and happiness on my pursuit for the meaning of life.

The theory of letting go

At some point in everyone’s life there comes a situation or predicament where you might have to let go. It could be a person, an object, an aspiration, a thought or an idea. It could be anything.
What it is really is in the words “letting go.” if you have to let go of something then it means you are attached to it. bound to it in some way. That attachment could just be desire.

One of the hardest things people face is having to let go of a loved one. That could mean someone close who has passed away or it could be a lover that you had to leave for reasons normal people would not comprehend. Leaving a lover for whatever the reason can be devastating to say the least, to both individuals. one builds a life with them, not alone but together creating memories so beautiful one couldn’t forget even if they wanted to.
Why is letting go so hard? What makes giving up what you love, so hard?
My answer is attachment.

One of the biggest instances when I faced a situation where I had to let go was almost an year ago when i injured my back. It didn’t happen spontaneously, but over time. I experienced pain in my lower back after workout sessions but I ignored my bodies cries for help. I shrugged off the warning signs and then it happened. I was playing basketball one day and I was going up for a shot and when I came down it wasn’t on my feet. The pain was excruciating. I had no idea what it was and I panicked. I couldn’t get up. Even a little movement would cause so much pain. I knew something was seriously wrong. I was bedridden for two whole days and even after then the pain didn’t quite subside but I was able to walk and I walked myself to a doctor.
The doctor told me I had lumbar scoliosis (a curvature in the spine) and that my left leg was shorter than the other. I do not know exactly how this happened as I had had no back problems in the past. It surprised me after twenty one years i’m just finding out that my spine is curved. I had been lifting quite heavy at the gym and my lower back muscles were excessively inflamed. The doctor told me that its going to take quite sometime to become one hundred percent.

When this happened i really questioned myself. Why did i let it become this worse? Does it mean I will have to give up working out? Working out became my recluse. I wanted to work out, develop my body. It was one of the main goals in my life. I wondered if i could ever lift as much as i used to. It depressed me to go to the gym and not be able to do what I used to do. The last thing I wanted was to make my situation worse so I stopped gym entirely and focused on getting better. Six months after the incident I was still experiencing pain if I overworked my back in any way. I couldn’t stand for too long. I couldn’t sit on chairs without a backrest. I couldn’t involve in impact sports. I had to let go of working out. It was one of the most difficult decisions I had to make because more that anything it affected me mentally. This mental downfall was because of attachment I believe. My attachment to my goal. So I began to ask myself how important are goals? should we go about achieving them even at the cost of our life?

Here’s is what I did. I didn’t give up. I believed that someday I will get to where I am and there are other people out there who are faced with even greater odds. I have made a full recovery and I am back in the gym almost an year later. I am steadily heading towards my goal and I believe with all my heart that I can get where I want to be.

Sometimes letting go doesn’t mean forever. Sometimes it means you just have to take a break, cut your losses, recuperate and get back on the road the first chance you get.

Why do I write?

Hello world.

I say world in the hopes that I can speak freely and unrestrained with what I say. There are all kinds of people in this world and I am one of those that love writing. A couple of years ago I found myself constantly trying to find answers to questions that I had about myself. Questions I all of a sudden desperately needed to find answers for. I began to look into myself. I reevaluated my values and my ideals. I constantly questioned myself about what it is that I wanted, what my purpose was and what I am to achieve in this life. I can tell you today that I have not found the answers to all that I wanted, but through my search I found something about myself that I loved doing and that was writing.

Writing became more than a hobby. Since the inception of the thought where I began to question myself. I kept a journal where I have recorded my findings and experiences with this world. I have recorded my growth mentally, physically and also spiritually. I found writing amongst meditating to be an outlet for when my emotions ran rampant, when my anger amongst other emotions got the better of me. Writing helps me address the thoughts inside of my head.

My interests are constantly changing. I like to think I’m a dynamic person in that sense. I like questioning the universe every chance I get. I try to keep an open mind and absorb and digest all kinds of information. Personally, I find this life a journey to find and discover myself so I always try looking inside than out when problems arise because I believe that the answers are always present within us, its just a matter of finding them.

I am a 21 year old student. Looking for the answers. I’m focused on personal development of the mind and the body, the meaning of life, love, growth as an individual and a group, happiness or should i say contentment and travel.
Everyday is a new experience and a new set of interactions with the external world. We might have the same routine but our interactions are new and I believe we define these interactions and ultimately govern the life we live in. All actions begin with a single thought regardless of how or what inspired it to be born in the first place. Thoughts are far reaching than most might think. The action to begin this blog began with a thought as well.

I hope whoever the reader is is able to obtain some form of useful knowledge.

Thank you